I'm -happy-

so, I was just watching Two and a Half Men (another show I love) and Alan asked Candy why she was with him... It got me thinking (due to that, and something me and Brandon were talking about earlier) why I was with Brandon. And I just realized how happy he makes me.

Today I found out that a guy I work with was a cutter. He denies it, and it's -possible- that it was just his dog (not very possible, but still, I'd hate for it to really be his dog and accuse him of cutting) and people were giving him a hard time, jokingly. And I defended him, saying that what someone like that needs is for people to be nice to him and give him positive attention. People like that need help, regardless of WHY they do it. If no one helps them then they may not get better and they may end up being so reliant on it that they loose the ability to fully recover and have constant relapse. I wouldn't wish a lifetime battle like that on anyone. For giving him that sympathy someone was like "how would you know lololololol" and I remind them of my past with cutting.

Brad, my manager, didn't know about that. He started asking me why, was I depressed? am I still depressed? and so on. Now that I really think about it, I HAVEN'T been depressed. My whole life I've always had an underlying depression regardless of how happy I seamed or what good things were going on. Even when I was with Spencer I had it.

So that passed and the day went on and I went to eat with Brandon. Then he walked me out to my car and sat on my lap while the car warmed up (yeah, he squeezed onto my lap in the drivers seat. I love it when he sits on my lap, he's not heavy, and I feel closer to him than when I sit on his) and he said that I was the only one for him. No matter what happened, at the end of the day he was still all mine. He went on to tell me that some people had been asking him if he had gotten married, because of the ring he has now that I got for him.. and comment about how committed he must be to our relationship to wear it. These are people who KNOW him. Surprised by how committed he is.

I realized that HE is the reason I'm so happy. It's Brandon that's rid me of my depression. He gives me strength and all that other lovey bullshit that people roll their eyes at unless it's happening to them. Brandon makes me happy. I'm happy now, because I have him.

They're doing a spoof of the door scene from yellow submarine on Family Guy. I really dislike the Beatles.

but I'm happy right now. so it's okay.

<3
S