I don't like the new blogger. Straight up don't like it. It's not as clean. I'll probably get over it. I don't blog a lot anymore between work and pinterest and living.
I have cramps. Not horrible ones. I'm not puking. But it hurts enough that I don't want to get out of bed to put my rice sock back into the microwave. I never think to get my heat wraps when I'm not on my period and when I am I'm in too much pain to get up and go. I'll need them if I'm working at GM. Plus I'll hopefully start some sort of birth control to reduce this bullshit. I'll keep the fucking Nuva Ring in and not get like this ever again. Whoever thinks birth control is for sluts obviously doesn't have a period.
I desperately want to finish another round in the blanket I'm making but I'm in too much pain to sit in a position to crochet.
Hopefully Jon is done taking care of the dogs soon so we can reheat my rice sock and maybe run to walgreen's. I don't work til 7, but I want to make the most out of my day.
I tie dye for the first time tomorrow! I'm excited.
XoXo,
S
April 27, 2012
April 13, 2012
600 posts
I don't want my 600th post to be about how pissed I am about my ER bill. So I'll write what I was going to write last night.
I had a dream... Involving My Little Pony, Harry Potter, trains, hospitals, and Chris Jericho. It was as awesome as it sounds.
There was a lot of talk about cutie marks at Hogwarts. And for some reason I was trying to avoid the professors at a quidditch match. I got there by train, as I was meeting up with my boyfriend Chris Jericho (who, oddly enough wasn't wearing his black and purple glittery wrestling speedo :C) but I had to duck out into the bathrooms to hide because I was in trouble or some shit, and the bathrooms I hid in were in the hospital. Then I left and ran into Jericho but he didn't want me to get caught so we decided to meet up when the quidditch/wrestling was over.
SO I wondered through the hospital until I found the train back and hopped on. My mom was on, and so was my little sister (who was pregnant again) and an old lady. The train was like a quad-decker bus or something, and we rode on the top. Instead of waiting for the train to stop people just jumped off into the streets. The old lady died when she jumped so I told my mom and sister not to do it, especially because my sister was pregnant. They both did anyway. Then I was finally back at the station where the match was happening and I could fly because I took a potion that gave me wings and since we were all ponified people everyone would think I was a pegasis instead of an earth pony so they wouldn't know it was me.
Sadly, Snape recognized me, and Jericho was trying to save me from being chased and then I woke up.
Yeah, I can't recall the last time I actually had a dream about dating a celebrity that i had a crush on. I don't even really have a crush on Jericho, he's just my favorite ass hole of the WWE.
Apparently there's a WICKED feud going on between Jericho and CM Punk over Punk being straight edge. Considering I hate Punk and his Jesus complex rubs me the wrong way, I'm fucking LOVING hearing about it. Everyone is calling Jericho a douche, but
1) Jericho has always been a douche
2) It's just a fucking ACT
3) CM Punk has a Jesus complex. It's why I also loved the feud he had with Mysterio. I love seeing guys I love beat the shit out of him.
4) IT'S AN ACT
5) the main complaint is that CM Punk shouldn't be hated for being straight edge because he's choosing the better lifestyle and he's better than everyone else who drinks and blah blah blah. The reason people hate straight edge people is for that attitude. You aren't better than someone else for not drinking. You could still be a shitty person with a shitty personality.
6) CM Punk has a huge Pepsi logo tattooed to his arm. WTF?
I search Chris Jericho on tumblr in hopes of finding sexy Gifs to save, and instead got a lot of people writing long ass posts stating the obvious. Chris Jericho (the wrestling character) is an douche.
I had a dream... Involving My Little Pony, Harry Potter, trains, hospitals, and Chris Jericho. It was as awesome as it sounds.
There was a lot of talk about cutie marks at Hogwarts. And for some reason I was trying to avoid the professors at a quidditch match. I got there by train, as I was meeting up with my boyfriend Chris Jericho (who, oddly enough wasn't wearing his black and purple glittery wrestling speedo :C) but I had to duck out into the bathrooms to hide because I was in trouble or some shit, and the bathrooms I hid in were in the hospital. Then I left and ran into Jericho but he didn't want me to get caught so we decided to meet up when the quidditch/wrestling was over.
SO I wondered through the hospital until I found the train back and hopped on. My mom was on, and so was my little sister (who was pregnant again) and an old lady. The train was like a quad-decker bus or something, and we rode on the top. Instead of waiting for the train to stop people just jumped off into the streets. The old lady died when she jumped so I told my mom and sister not to do it, especially because my sister was pregnant. They both did anyway. Then I was finally back at the station where the match was happening and I could fly because I took a potion that gave me wings and since we were all ponified people everyone would think I was a pegasis instead of an earth pony so they wouldn't know it was me.
Sadly, Snape recognized me, and Jericho was trying to save me from being chased and then I woke up.
Yeah, I can't recall the last time I actually had a dream about dating a celebrity that i had a crush on. I don't even really have a crush on Jericho, he's just my favorite ass hole of the WWE.
Apparently there's a WICKED feud going on between Jericho and CM Punk over Punk being straight edge. Considering I hate Punk and his Jesus complex rubs me the wrong way, I'm fucking LOVING hearing about it. Everyone is calling Jericho a douche, but
1) Jericho has always been a douche
2) It's just a fucking ACT
3) CM Punk has a Jesus complex. It's why I also loved the feud he had with Mysterio. I love seeing guys I love beat the shit out of him.
4) IT'S AN ACT
5) the main complaint is that CM Punk shouldn't be hated for being straight edge because he's choosing the better lifestyle and he's better than everyone else who drinks and blah blah blah. The reason people hate straight edge people is for that attitude. You aren't better than someone else for not drinking. You could still be a shitty person with a shitty personality.
6) CM Punk has a huge Pepsi logo tattooed to his arm. WTF?
I search Chris Jericho on tumblr in hopes of finding sexy Gifs to save, and instead got a lot of people writing long ass posts stating the obvious. Chris Jericho (the wrestling character) is an douche.
April 10, 2012
S's guide to dealing with people you don't want to talk to you.
I like Jenna Marbles "how to get guys to like you" video in all its sarcastic glory.
I'd also like to point out that a lot of girls act like that for a reason. Guys and their unintentional (for the purpose of no confrontation) mind games.
If you meet a girl and you get to talking... and you're thinking "man, I'm not into this girl" then don't in any way lead her on. This will include ignoring her. But, it also includes telling her you aren't interested. Being upfront. Especially before she gets to the crazy part. If she's honestly texting you a couple times a day despite no reply, it's time to break it to her that you aren't interested.
I know that I personally am USED to people who aren't very easy to get ahold of. My boyfriend doesn't like to text period. My brother NEVER replies because he tends to be engrossed in his video games and by the time he's done he has long since forgotten the message.
Don't think that people should take the hint by your distant behavior. I've dated guys who were a little distant at first. Some people are just distant people (myself) even if they like you. Instead of trying to get them to "take the hint" (aka: unintentionally playing mind games in hopes of them doing what you want without telling them) just fucking say what you want to them.
Why spend a month trying to ignore someone you don't like when you could have resolved the problem by telling them from the start that you weren't really interested and didn't like them? Don't be a prick about it. Don't TRY to hurt them, and don't try to soften the blow so much that the message doesn't get across (it's about as effective and ignoring them).
The point I'm making?
If you don't like someone, especially in that way and ESPECIALLY if they clearly like you, tell them. Say CALMLY "Hey, _____, I know we had fun that one time, but I'm really not interested in you so it'd be better if we just break our contact from one another and go our separate ways." and then? Don't talk to them. At all. Ever again. When you've done that and she THEN continues to bother you, you can call her crazy.
(I say to tell them calmly because if you seem to be having a fight or argument someone else can rationalize that you didn't mean it and that you were just upset. If you're unreasonable mean they'll feel that you're just having a bad day. Don't give them a reason to not believe what you're saying.)
That's all I got.
XoXo,
S
I'd also like to point out that a lot of girls act like that for a reason. Guys and their unintentional (for the purpose of no confrontation) mind games.
If you meet a girl and you get to talking... and you're thinking "man, I'm not into this girl" then don't in any way lead her on. This will include ignoring her. But, it also includes telling her you aren't interested. Being upfront. Especially before she gets to the crazy part. If she's honestly texting you a couple times a day despite no reply, it's time to break it to her that you aren't interested.
I know that I personally am USED to people who aren't very easy to get ahold of. My boyfriend doesn't like to text period. My brother NEVER replies because he tends to be engrossed in his video games and by the time he's done he has long since forgotten the message.
Don't think that people should take the hint by your distant behavior. I've dated guys who were a little distant at first. Some people are just distant people (myself) even if they like you. Instead of trying to get them to "take the hint" (aka: unintentionally playing mind games in hopes of them doing what you want without telling them) just fucking say what you want to them.
Why spend a month trying to ignore someone you don't like when you could have resolved the problem by telling them from the start that you weren't really interested and didn't like them? Don't be a prick about it. Don't TRY to hurt them, and don't try to soften the blow so much that the message doesn't get across (it's about as effective and ignoring them).
The point I'm making?
If you don't like someone, especially in that way and ESPECIALLY if they clearly like you, tell them. Say CALMLY "Hey, _____, I know we had fun that one time, but I'm really not interested in you so it'd be better if we just break our contact from one another and go our separate ways." and then? Don't talk to them. At all. Ever again. When you've done that and she THEN continues to bother you, you can call her crazy.
(I say to tell them calmly because if you seem to be having a fight or argument someone else can rationalize that you didn't mean it and that you were just upset. If you're unreasonable mean they'll feel that you're just having a bad day. Don't give them a reason to not believe what you're saying.)
That's all I got.
XoXo,
S
April 09, 2012
weak
My mom let my 16 year old sister get her second tattoo, in a highly visible spot on her arm.
Is it sad that the only time I don't dislike my mom is when I don't talk to her or my sister? I want to. I really do. She's my mom and it's my sister.
Props to her for not covering it up at the family events though. I'm so much bolder about who I am on facebook.
I didn't get to see Jon yesterday because I was sleepy. It's the first day since the start of this year that I haven't seen him, unless you want to be really technical and count that he wasn't home until 1am from work, so I DID see him on April 8th, but only for like an hour. I wish I'd have gone to the Fort to see him, but I was so tired and I needed to bathe.
I basically spend my days sitting around and waiting for GM to call. Everyone keeps telling me to be prepared for how much it's going to suck. I know it'll suck, and I'm afraid I'm not cut out for it. I even already know I may or may not cry during and after my first shift because i cry so easily. Not even because I'm delicate, I'm just sensitive to crying. I really need this to work out for me, and I need to find strength somehow. I don't know where to turn for that. Usually it's my close friends and myself that keeps me strong. I already feel like I've failed myself in so ways for trying to drop out of school. I haven't gotten a confirmation letter on that yet, but I'm scared. Even if they accept it I'll be in debt like $3000 and I won't be making money until I get called to work at GM. Fuck Wendy's. How can a 40 hour week not pay for bills when you don't pay rent? I can't even expect to make $8/hr there EVER. My brother is the assistant manager and he only makes $8.75.
I feel so trapped. Maybe this should be where I let my animal instincts kick in; trap me in a corner and a normally peaceful me will start fighting for their life.
Lets hope I have the strength and courage.
XoXo,
S
Is it sad that the only time I don't dislike my mom is when I don't talk to her or my sister? I want to. I really do. She's my mom and it's my sister.
Props to her for not covering it up at the family events though. I'm so much bolder about who I am on facebook.
I didn't get to see Jon yesterday because I was sleepy. It's the first day since the start of this year that I haven't seen him, unless you want to be really technical and count that he wasn't home until 1am from work, so I DID see him on April 8th, but only for like an hour. I wish I'd have gone to the Fort to see him, but I was so tired and I needed to bathe.
I basically spend my days sitting around and waiting for GM to call. Everyone keeps telling me to be prepared for how much it's going to suck. I know it'll suck, and I'm afraid I'm not cut out for it. I even already know I may or may not cry during and after my first shift because i cry so easily. Not even because I'm delicate, I'm just sensitive to crying. I really need this to work out for me, and I need to find strength somehow. I don't know where to turn for that. Usually it's my close friends and myself that keeps me strong. I already feel like I've failed myself in so ways for trying to drop out of school. I haven't gotten a confirmation letter on that yet, but I'm scared. Even if they accept it I'll be in debt like $3000 and I won't be making money until I get called to work at GM. Fuck Wendy's. How can a 40 hour week not pay for bills when you don't pay rent? I can't even expect to make $8/hr there EVER. My brother is the assistant manager and he only makes $8.75.
I feel so trapped. Maybe this should be where I let my animal instincts kick in; trap me in a corner and a normally peaceful me will start fighting for their life.
Lets hope I have the strength and courage.
XoXo,
S
April 06, 2012
life :D
I keep trying to write and I keep stopping because I never know what to say to make a coherent post. A lot is going on, and I'll just go through it all because it's my blog and I can be as boring as I want.
I had my drug test today for GM. I'm 99.9% positive that I'll pass. That .1% is the fear that they'll mess up my sample or that I accidentally came into contact with pot (due to excessive hippie friends) and that the test is so sensitive that a half second of breathing in a room where someone else is smoking will effect my test results. Basically, if I don't pass I'll be pissed. The biggest reason I haven't even TRIED drugs is because I was hoping that at some point in my future me having not done them would put me ahead of someone who was more qualified for a job than I was. This is that time.
On the topic of GM, I was talking to my friend who referred me. I was feeling iffy about how much time I'd end up working there since it's only temp. If I was only going to work there for a month or two, I'm still pretty fucked financially. I'd be 100% back on my feet. I'd have been able to save quite a bit and take care of my own bills for once. But then the money flow that I needed (okay, the money flow is fucking EXCESSIVE compared to what I actually NEED) would stop and I'd slow empty my savings again and be fucked.
He told me that most temp summer workers do about 3-4 months (which is a great amount of time, I'd be able to make my car payments for at least a whole year if I work that long.) A weight had been lifted off my chest and I felt great about the whole situation again. He even said that a lot of the temp workers at GM right now never stopped work. like, they asked them to keep working so they're basically full time workers without the union.
On a very related note, I found a LOVELY studio apartment in a small high rise downtown, near everything I want to be near. Only $335/month plus electric. I'm not sure I'm ready to take on the cost of living on my own (that's 335/month I could be SAVING or WASTING on other things, seeing how I live for free with my dad and stay at Jon's, which is a 15 minute walk away from the apartment I'm looking at). But having my own studio is kind of a dream of mine. A HUGE one. And in a year, me and Jon will probably be at the state where we move in together. I want to live alone for a bit in my studio (and me and Jon can't fit into a tiny apartment together. We get along great, but there's no other room to go to when you need to be alone). It's one of those things, where I have to determine a future choice now, and I'm not sure about it.
Jon just came home and I feel weird blogging around him, so later.
XoXo,
S
I had my drug test today for GM. I'm 99.9% positive that I'll pass. That .1% is the fear that they'll mess up my sample or that I accidentally came into contact with pot (due to excessive hippie friends) and that the test is so sensitive that a half second of breathing in a room where someone else is smoking will effect my test results. Basically, if I don't pass I'll be pissed. The biggest reason I haven't even TRIED drugs is because I was hoping that at some point in my future me having not done them would put me ahead of someone who was more qualified for a job than I was. This is that time.
On the topic of GM, I was talking to my friend who referred me. I was feeling iffy about how much time I'd end up working there since it's only temp. If I was only going to work there for a month or two, I'm still pretty fucked financially. I'd be 100% back on my feet. I'd have been able to save quite a bit and take care of my own bills for once. But then the money flow that I needed (okay, the money flow is fucking EXCESSIVE compared to what I actually NEED) would stop and I'd slow empty my savings again and be fucked.
He told me that most temp summer workers do about 3-4 months (which is a great amount of time, I'd be able to make my car payments for at least a whole year if I work that long.) A weight had been lifted off my chest and I felt great about the whole situation again. He even said that a lot of the temp workers at GM right now never stopped work. like, they asked them to keep working so they're basically full time workers without the union.
On a very related note, I found a LOVELY studio apartment in a small high rise downtown, near everything I want to be near. Only $335/month plus electric. I'm not sure I'm ready to take on the cost of living on my own (that's 335/month I could be SAVING or WASTING on other things, seeing how I live for free with my dad and stay at Jon's, which is a 15 minute walk away from the apartment I'm looking at). But having my own studio is kind of a dream of mine. A HUGE one. And in a year, me and Jon will probably be at the state where we move in together. I want to live alone for a bit in my studio (and me and Jon can't fit into a tiny apartment together. We get along great, but there's no other room to go to when you need to be alone). It's one of those things, where I have to determine a future choice now, and I'm not sure about it.
Jon just came home and I feel weird blogging around him, so later.
XoXo,
S
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