continuous efforts

The days keep on moving while I sit here silently.

I feel as though if I stopped trying I'd cease to exist, and a part of me really wants to give up.

I'm afraid of the future, and my past, and the present, so instead of moving I'll just sit here and watch.

Everything has been a blur. Boredom. Exhaustion. Self-loathing. All melted together and brushed over the days on my calendar. I don't know what to do. I don't know where it started, and I can't tell where its going to end.

Thanks for the hope, the smiles, the strange conversations and making me feel human again. I'm afraid I'll have to let go soon, but holding on is the only thing that keeps me from disappearing.

So I'm sorry.